February 27, 2020

Discipline

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Discipline


I'll never forget, I was 7 years old and I wanted to stay to my Aunt Jolethia's house, but my mother and father told me no I had school the next day.And that I could come back tomorrow.I was not going for it. I kicked and screamed down the steps, up the sidewalk, and into the car. I made a big fuss.That night I don't know what came over me I was going to do anything to stay.So I decided to pull my mothers freshly done pineapple waves.We had a small compact two door car and some how my mother managed to body slam me in the car.All I remember was going up in the air and waking up the next morning in my bed. Ever since that fateful night my parents did not have to worry about discipline problems from me.But for the new generation discipline is a foreign word.


There are more out of control children today than ever before, due to not only lack of discipline, but also, parental involvement in the lives of their children.It is not enough to just discipline a child and not find out what is going on in that child's life.Parental involvement is as important as setting up rules and following through, by punishing the child when those rules are broken.Parents need to be aware of who his friends are, and are the friends the parents have met, those ones their kid is hanging out with?Be aware of who are the people that are influencing their child.Try to find out as best they can what is happening in their kids' life, any problems or pressures that might trouble a kid, and become problematic for either the child or the parent.


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There are kids that do what they want to do because they know all their parents are going to do is yell at them a little bit, and that is it for their punishment.After yelling for a while, the parent feel like their job is done and things resume as if nothing happened. It does not matter what the child has done, some parents think that a good scolding will do the trick, and the child will change his malicious ways.For example, a kid decides to go out with his friends, and stays out really late, because they were having fun roaming the streets.To the kid, time does not matter; he will go home whenever he gets tired or he gets good and ready; he figures to heck with the curfew.He knows that the only repercussion he faces consists of getting yelled at.He'll say he is sorry and problem solved.


Some parents have a strict guideline that they enforce, but the child is out with other kids that get him involved with some type of wrong doing, and the parents have no idea what their child is up to.When the child does get caught doing something bad, they set a punishment and make sure it is enforced, but never bother to talk to their child, to find out why he did what he did, and whom he was with.As an example, an adolescent, we'll call him John, tells his parents that he is sleeping over at friends house, because they are going to rent some videos and just hangout.The parents agree after all, they run a tight ship and figure the kid knows the consequences.So John goes to his friends' house only to meet other friends there, and go drinking.In the middle of the night the doorbell rings, John's dad comes to the door; it's the police. Sir, do you have a son by the name of John, the officer asks?We pulled a kid over because he was obviously driving drunk.The driver, your son, along with two other juveniles, was completely inebriated; we will release John over to you.Both parents go through the roof, immediately they start yelling at the kid for quite a while, and send him to his room.In the morning, the scolding begins again.They ground him for a month, take away some privileges, and things return too normal.The parents never bother to find out who their child is hanging out with, who are his friends, or even meet with the parents of their-child's' friends, to make sure that he is in good company, and not hanging out with the wrong crowd, the type of crowd that will get him into trouble.Their only concern was to punish John.


Parental involvement is as crucial as is discipline in a child's life. Parents cannot discipline a child without finding out why the child is doing what he is doing, and whom he is doing it with.Parents have to be aware as best they can, what is going on in their child's life, to help them, reassure them when peer pressure might be getting a bit difficult to deal with.Parents involved in their child's life build a stronger bond making it easier for the child to talk to their parents when problems arise.But, just being involved in the child's life is not going to do the trick.The parents might have a good open relationship with their child, but the parents have to discipline the child when they do wrong, they can't set up the rules and not enforce them, because kids will do as they please when there are no repercussions for their actions.Discipline and parental involvement go hand in hand; discipline alone is not enough.


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